4 Thought Patterns That Prevent Peace & Wellbeing
@live.love.bri | 2022 Christ in Common Women’s Retreat | Montana
“Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Philippians 4:8 NLT
Philippians 4:8 has always stumped me. I know that we are supposed to think of things that are pure and good, but sometimes that feels impossible. How can I flip the script in my mind to focus on happy thoughts when the world seems to be pressing in on me from every side? What do I do with the heartache I feel as I watch my children struggle and suffer? Where can lightheartedness and joy be found when I feel anxious and out of control?
The struggle is real and the mind is a powerful thing.
Our lives always move in the direction of our strongest thoughts, and there are two worldviews that are always in motion and competing for our attention.
Most of us are not aware of the filter/worldview we see things through or where they even came from, but what would happen if we were more cognizant of that stuff? Would we feel the same way about our bank accounts, our homes, our neighbors, our struggles…ourselves?
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Dr. Wayne Dyer
The way we think will either help us or harm us, so if you’re tired of fighting to feel happy, content and calm inside, these four thought patterns may be why.
4 Thought Patterns That Prevent Peace & Bring Heartache
The worldview that brings the most harm, is the worldview we were all born into.
How’s that for hope?
The world we live in does not match up with the world we, as Christ-followers, came from. If you are a Christian, you are a citizen of heaven, a daughter or son of God Almighty. His Kingdom is unshakeable, and God rules as its King. His ways, His thoughts, and the worldview of His Kingdom are the complete opposite of this world. And, our hearts were made for and from His, so of course the things of this world can never satisfy us.
See if you can recognize these four thought patterns in your life.
Worldview: Separated
Scarcity: There is not enough… I’m not enough.
Certainty: The world must be safe and predictable.
Perfection: Failure is not an option.
Self-Interest: It’s all about me.
When we view our lives through these four filters, we find ourselves in a constant state of separateness and conflict. We have a “me against them” attitude. We are focused on our own success, and we are fighting for our own good. We distance ourselves, and our first instinct is to compare ourselves to others. Comparison then leads to unhealthy competition that traps us in a cycle of self-promotion because, deep down, we feel like we’re not enough (scarcity). Where there’s self-promotion, there’s always self-protection because we feel like we have to defend our value because if others can’t see it and affirm it, we must not be enough.
When we get caught up in this awful cycle, we are conforming to the patterns of the world and we find ourselves imitating anyone and anything to feel worthy, rather than freeing ourselves up to find unique inspiration.
Certainty and perfection are the death of faith, inspiration, and creativity.
The opposite of faith is not doubt, it’s certainty.” Anne Lamott
When we seek to be certain, we are running after a false belief that all things can be knowable and understood. Knowledge and information alone can never transform us, and when we demand certainty, we will only find ourselves more disappointed, distrusting, discouraged, and fearful. This is not the rich and satisfying life that the Son of God poured His life out for us to experience.
At the root of it all is a scarcity mentality, a sense that there is just not enough. How many times a day do we catch ourselves thinking (and even saying) there’s not enough time, I don’t have enough money, my husband is not like hers, my kids aren’t like his, my house isn’t as nice as theirs? I could go on and on, and I sometimes do, but when I do, I’ve become keenly aware that I’m seeing my life through the world’s viewpoint.
When we align with the world’s point of view, our peace is robbed and our well-being is rocked.
When scarcity and not enoughness are top of mind, even our view of God can become distorted. Deep down we question if His love is enough, or if He’s enough because He might not give us what we perceive we need.
The worldview sucks. The worldview hurts us.
There is a better way.
4 Thought Patterns That Bring Peace, Healing & Well-Being
When we shift our focus away from the ways of this world, we can expect to experience a shift towards health and peace in our hearts.
You have permission to do things differently than the world does. And, when you do, you are not only walking in your truest identity, but you are active and engaged in the legacy of Jesus Christ Himself.
Just as there are 4 worldly thought patterns, there are 4 Kingdom thought patterns.
Kingdom Worldview: Connected
Abundance: There is enough.
Mystery: Life is an opening to the unknown.
Fallibility: It’s OK for me to make a mistake, there is room for imperfection.
Common Good: It is about the good of the community and we are all interconnected.
When we view our lives and this world through the Kingdom worldview, we are secure in the generous and abundant grace of God. To believe in abundance is to believe that you already have enough and that you will get enough, even when things are hard or uncertain.
I absolutely love these three words: I. Get. Enough.
I get enough affirmation.
I get enough attention.
I have enough resources.
I’m doing enough.
I am enough.
God is enough.
Sometimes we just need to be reminded that there is enough.
At the core of the Kingdom worldview is a sense of having enough. There is no lack or limit in God’s Kingdom. Life is not like a pan of brownies with a limited amount of pieces. We don’t have to freak out when someone takes a bite. There’s enough for everybody, and God’s good stuff can never be fully consumed.
Mystery is not a problem to be solved.
“Mystery doesn’t mean something is unknowable, it means that there is endless knowability.” Richard Rohr
That’s the coolest part about our journey of faith. We will never run out of things to learn about God. Mystery is an invitation for adventure and discovery, and we’re going to be OK in the end because God’s in control and we are not.
We make a pretty crappy god. Who wants that pressure, who wants that pedestal? Who’s strong enough for it?
No one but God.
We are created to serve, love, connect, and follow God, and we can’t mess things up when we live a life that’s characterized by those things.
Last but not least is the freedom to be flawed. Messing up and making mistakes is a natural condition that results in growth. (Oh how I wish I could have learned this earlier) When we mess up we not only learn, but it often creates an opportunity for us to give and receive forgiveness.
“Forgiveness is the oxygen we breathe in the Kingdom of God.” Jamie Winship
If we actively refuse to attach our identity and worth to the approval of people, we are freed up to forgive. Forgiveness always draws us closer to one another. In the connected worldview, we are ministers of reconciliation, even towards our enemies.
When we live from a place of connection, we are partnered with the power of Creator God, and that changes absolutely everything.
Our lives always move in the direction of our strongest thoughts, and there are two worldviews that are always in motion and competing for our attention.
Which worldview will you choose to see your life, yourself, others, and God through?
Choose carefully because only one of them is true.
*The 2 World Stories adapted from An Other Kingdom: Departing the Consumer Culture by Peter Block. Becoming Connected by Jamie Winship